|one more ?
||[Jan. 17th, 2010|09:03 pm]
Does anyone feel like when they are in good spirits, they are unable to recall ever feeling low, and vice versa? Like a very poor or selective memory. Makes it very difficult to assess growth or judge severity of depressive moods.|
I lied I have another question....
Do you think impulsivity is a good or bad thing? I keep getting these strong urges to take off and do something crazy...live at hostels for a year or travel around Europe. But I wouldn't want to do it unless it was a longterm life change. Otherwise it wouldn't be worth it...wouldn't be an energizing enough endevor for me to take on.
I know impulsivity is generally viewed as a bad thing if you are depressed...but why? Seems like a genius way to feel alive again. Even if it is scary....at least you are learning, growing...at least you will not be numb anymore.
OK i am done posting now I promise :)
In the objective sense I can recall it, but it's often difficult to see it as relevant, irrespective of which way around you're talking about.
Sometimes I have periods of elevated mood where I have more energy than I normally possess, where I normally have to consciously think about what I want to do for that day, since my dysthymia tends to dictate what does or does not get done. At that particular moment, it is easy to forget the depressed times, and I want it to last forever.
I've had periods of impulsiveness where I have seriously thought about chucking it all and simply going traveling around the world for a while. It was not anything planned to be livelong, more like wanderlust, for lack of a better description.
1. Yes, totally, you describe exactly how I feel. Also, whatever mood I'm in, it feels like it'll never end.
2.I don't know. As long as it is a sensible idea then I think it's great. It's not so good if your impulse is to hurt yourself. I like to plan everything way in advance, but I'm told that I'm quite impulse too.
When I am in good spirits it is really hard to remember exactly why I felt so bad or how I felt. I think that's part of the reason it took so long to finally be assessed and diagnosed. What has helped me is keeping a journal. If I look back then I can see what was going on, how I was feeling, and I can track my mood.
In response to your second point, for me impulsiveness has been REALLY bad. I have wrecked my finances and I'm married so that means I've also hurt my husband and children. It has put a huge strain on my marriage and eroded my self-esteem even further which I didn't think was possible. That's my experience anyway.